From a very young age, I always loved art and was drawn to it, wanted to be immersed in it.
As I got older and lost my child's imagination, I felt like I was spinning my tires and not getting anywhere. It got so bad that I couldn't really enjoy drawing and painting. I felt like a poser. I'd say I loved creating, but was too afraid to pick up a brush and try anything, afraid of how it would come out.
This was for several reasons:
I was becoming a perfectionist. I couldn't make messy art, I couldn't just explore. I was so disappointed in myself if a drawing or painting didn't turn out.
I was burnt out. Probably because of my perfectionism. I was exhausting myself feeling like I had to create a masterpiece every single time. I didn't have the creative energy to just play with paint anymore.
I was stingy. I was stingy with both my time and money. I didn't want to waste art supplies I had paid hard-earned money for on exploratory painting and drawing. I didn't want to waste my time on making messes.
This went on for several years, and I almost got rid of all of my art materials. Finally, when I was 23, I opened the completely unused box of gouache paints I had purchased almost a year ago and painted this:
Is it perfect? No. Is it even a good painting? That's subjective, but I would also say no. But I will always hang on to this piece and it has become kind of a reference point for me. It's a piece I look back on and say "look how far I've come". I repaint this piece every once in a while. When you paint the same subject it's sometimes easier to see your growth.
My Solutions:
If any of this is speaking to you, I am so glad you are reading this. Here are some points to consider if you're feeling in a slump like I was. (I go back and look at this when I feel like I'm slumping too!)
Perfectionism
Its OK to make mistakes! No one is born an incredible artist. Yes, it comes more naturally to some than others, but you have to learn. You learn by doing. You can watch all the tutorials and read all the books you want, but if you don't do it yourself and learn for yourself, you won't experience that rapid growth and improvement you are looking for. (I'm not saying you shouldn't watch tutorials or read books, they are both excellent tools for growing as an artist!!!). I will be writing another post about ways to loosen up and break out of your comfort zone! Growth isn't always comfortable!
Burn-Out
If you are feeling burnt out, you probably aren't enjoying the time you are spending in the studio. If it's feeling forced or labored, maybe try a new tutorial, or just mindless play time with your favorite medium. If you need more than this, you may need to take some time to consider more deeply why you feel this way. For me it was because I was putting too much pressure on myself to be a "good" artist.
Stingy with Supplies
My dad told me that the only art supplies that are a waste of money are the ones you never use. And he is right! I'm not saying you should go out and buy the most expensive everything and spend large amounts of money on art supplies. I include a small allowance every month in my budget for art supplies (although I may exclude it if I know I'm going to be tight on money). I've purchased lots of art supplies that I haven't even taken out of the packaging yet because I feel like I'm not good enough for them. Don't be afraid to try out new paints, brushes, paper, etc.! You paid for them, you should enjoy them! They're made to be used! I challenge you today to make something with any unused art supplies you have at home. Even if it is something small and messy!
Stingy with Time
This one is hard. Especially if you are a busy person, it can feel hard to justify spending time creating when you have a to-do list 10 miles long. ( I also think I used this as an excuse to avoid feeling disappointed if my piece didn't turn out) To combat this, I made myself spend just 10 or 15 minutes at a time doing quick sketches or watercolor paintings ( more to come on this too!). Often I'd find myself going a little bit longer each time, finding a little more time each week.
I'm so thankful that you took the time to read this and I hope this helps you in your creative journey. Id' love to hear from you! Feel free to contact me with any questions, send me your work, and tag me on social media so I can see what you're creating!
God bless,
Rachel at Uplifting Artworks
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